“REAL FACE TIME” with your teens and young people by Valerie D. Weeks, MCCP, Board Certified Clinical Christian Counselor of Psychology

The question arises by many of us who are in our forties and older; Why are teens so consumed, connected and drawn to technology? Primarily cell phones, social media (Facebook, twitter, constant web surfing, etc…..

There is a new term or common phrase in the teen vernacular these days called: FOMO (fear of missing out) My question is? Missing out on WHAT?

There is so much going on in the world that is filtered/funneled through the web/social media.

Social Media seems to be a platform for primarily voyeurism. “Hey everyone look at me and my [blank]”. Instant voyeurism in the comfort of your own home, car, store, etc….

No work, no effort, merely instant gratification.

My next question would be; are they looking for emotional satisfaction? A fleshly feeling? To covet? A way to help someone? to gossip?, a way to feel important?, to compare oneself to others? and the list goes on. Nonetheless, our youth and young adults are obviously, loss, distracted, and restless.

We live in an instant or microwave society due to rapidly produced and super intelligent software/technology developers whose creative ability is on steroids!! Speed (fast, fast, fast,….you can get it, see it, do it NOW!!!!

Back in the day, we had something called: “patience”, “anticipation”, “dreaming/wishing”,  “imagination”….and also appreciation!!!!

Which, all of these things seem contrary to social media/internet.

Let’s talk about some of the things that may help or capture the attention of young people for “real face time” family interaction the way God intended it to be:

Studies reveal that most teens are self-centered, so base on that, let me suggest that parent/s create a family team concept and have each child or teen/youth in family to be the team lead for a month to create weekly outings/events etc….(of course supervised by the parent/s).

This will give the teen exposure to teamwork, leadership, and creativity resulting in increased communication, self-worth, and family acceptance and family cohesion.

Lastly: Have the parent/s create a “Dream Big Vision” theme by suggesting that the youth create a  vision board based on what they want or where they see themselves in 5 years or so. Once completed, hang or display the vision boards throughout the house and occasionally remind them of it.